K D Grace's Musings

I've Moved!

2010-12-27T04:37:00.000-08:00

All the up and coming good stuff from my blog and all the latest writing news is now available at my new Hopeful Romantic website, kdgrace.co.uk

Join me and my friends there for all the fun and all the latest.

You don't ACT like someone who writes erotica

2010-12-19T03:59:00.000-08:00

Closely linked to the discussion of what erotica writers look like is the discussion of what erotica writers act like. Most of us don’t mind so much when people say we don’t look like erotica writers. What really bothers us is when people just assumed that we have DONE all the things we write about.

No one assumes Thomas Harris is a cannibalistic serial killer. No one assumes Anne Rice drinks blood and sleeps in a coffin. No one assumes Tom Clancy spent time being a terrorist. And yet, there are those who assume erotica writers have done everything we write about. For people who make that assumption, I have just one question; what part of the concept of FICTION don’t they get?

Fiction writers don’t have to experience what they write in order to write about it. In fact, that’s why it’s fiction. IT DIDN’T HAPPEN! At least not anywhere outside the fertile mind of the writer. Erotic fiction is no different.

Fiction allows the reader and the writer to experience safely situations and worlds that in reality would not be safe or even possible. In a world where safe sex has become a battle cry, even its own form of bondage, this is especially true with erotica. The erotica writer allows the reader to participate safely in a world that can be both very wonderful and very dangerous. It is no more necessary for erotica writers to have an orgy so they can write about one than it was for Thomas Harris to kill and eat a few folk before he could create Hannibal Lector.

Imagining an erotica writer who must experience firsthand her orgy, bondage, or sex in a bus before she writes about it adds another layer to the psycho-sexual fantasy. The fantasy may be very sexy indeed. But in reality, IT’S FICTION!

Lily Harlem's Scorching Hot Novella, 'The Mother of All Hen Nights'- What happened just before Happy Ever After

2010-12-12T08:20:00.000-08:00

After the glass slipper and before happily ever after, ever wonder what Cinderella and her girl friends got up to on her hen night? Well, Lily Harlem did, and her resulting novella, The Mother of All Hen Nights, is a kick-arse, fast paced, hotter than fire night out at the Turret Club with Belle, Rapunzel and Tinkerbell all out to show innocent little Cinders a good time and hopefully teach her a thing or two about men before the big fairy tale wedding to Prince Charming and the mother of all surprises on the wedding night.

While Cinders gets educated in ways to handle a lusty prince, Rapunzel gets tied up in the basement where she brings out the animal in The Beast. The tongue in cheek fun never ends and the temperature never drops below the lusty boiling point. Lily Harlem’s fun feisty fairy tale Mother of All Hen Nights is a must read.

Kinky Christmas Reading Worth the Wait

2010-12-12T04:04:00.000-08:00

The Kinky Christmas Read at Sh! Women’s Erotic Emporium, Hoxton, may have been postponed for a week due to snow, but, wow! When it happened, what a party it turned out to be!

The lovely Ladiez at Sh! went all out to decorate the shop for Christmas, and in addition to Christmas bobbles and fairy lights, the walls were adorned with the kinky, sexy works of artist, Compulsive Behaviour. Add to it all the comings and goings of Christmas shoppers picking out just that right sexy gift for someone special, and the stage was set for a fabulous evening.

Kristina Lloyd, Scarlett French and I read kinky stories to a full house of happy, pink-fizzing drinking partakers of kink – every erotica writer’s dream audience.

I kick-started the evening with hot sex on a Harley from the pages of my novel, The Initiation of Ms Holly.

Scarlett French, looking rather cow-girlish for the evening, read her very hot story of two girls and a purple strap-on in ‘Dinner at Crompton’s from Sacchi Green’s fabulous anthology, Girl Crazy.

Finally the elegantly sexy Kristina Lloyd ended the evening with a dark and twisted tale of jealousy, ‘Such a Special Couple,’ from Alison Tyler’s hot anthololgy, J is for Jealousy.

While we readers read, the lovely Sh! Ladiez made sure all glasses were well-topped with fizz and no one went away cupcake-less. The atmosphere was festive, relaxed, and fun. But if my experience was any indication, I’d have to say we readers had the best time of all. It was a great beginning to the Christmas season.

You don't LOOK like someone who writes erotica...

2010-12-07T07:46:00.000-08:00

'You don’t look like someone who writes erotica.'

I get that all the time, and I have to smile. It’s a bit like being told, ‘you don’t look like you’re not wearing any knickers. You don’t look like you just had extra cream in your coffee. You don’t look like you’ve been reading Cosmo in the ladies room.’

Contrary to popular belief, most erotica writers actually do look exactly like erotica writers. In fact I look exactly like an erotica writer. Problem is most people don’t know what erotica writers look like. And, fair enough, I have to admit we’re a very difficult lot to recognize, so I’m going to give a very short crash course in how to spot an erotica writer. Not that it’ll help much. We’re masters of disguise. But perhaps it will give some idea of what you're actually up against so you won’t feel so bad next time you discover that the woman checking you out at the pharmacy, or the bloke tapping away on his laptop at Starbucks, or the chick picking up her kids after school is an erotica writer.

First, you need to know what NOT to look for in an erotica writer. Unless said writer is doing a reading from her erotic writings and is trying to look like people expect an erotica writer to look, the person least likely to be an erotica writer is the one dressed in fishnet stockings and nose-bleed stilettos. Likewise don’t expect her to be the one with peek-a-boo cleavage and a leather mini, or the one with Dita Von Teese make-up.

In fact, the most outstanding thing about an erotica writer is that she doesn’t stand out. In fact it's to her benefit not to stand out. She’ll be the one in the coffee shop in the corner in the back. She’ll be wearing jeans and a jumper because minis and tiny tops are just too damn cold and uncomfortable to sit around and write in, and erotica writers are endlessly practical. She probably won’t be wearing any make-up because the time it takes to put on a face is time that could be spent getting down the fab hot story idea that came to her while she was cleaning her teeth this morning.

Yep, chances are very good you won’t notice her at all, but she’ll notice you. She’ll notice everyone and everything around her, and she’ll filter it all through the mind set of possibilities, sexy possibilities, stories to be woven, and heat to be generated on the written page. She’ll have her head down, writing like a mad woman. And if she has a quirky little smile half plastered across her face, you’ll know she’s found the hot idea she’s been looking for.

Some erotica writers don’t stand out because they didn’t even make it to the coffee shop. They’re still curled up at home in their pajamas with a cuppa writing a story sparked off by a dream they had. They may be in their most comfy track suit, hair pulled back in a ponytail, feet snuggled in fuzzy slippers while they tap away on the laptop at the kitchen table. They may be scribbling away in a little purple notebook during their lunch break at the office.

It’s hard to say where they’ll turn up, or how they’ll disguise themselves, or what occupation they might take up to fit in to every-day, non-erotica-writing society. But it’s a pretty good bet that when they do decide to reveal themselves, you’ll still be picking your jaw up off the floor saying, ‘Wow, you sure don’t LOOK like someone who writes erotica.’

Snow Daze! Kinky Christmas Rescheduled

2010-12-02T03:06:00.000-08:00

The Kinky Christmas Reading has been rescheduled for next Friday, 10th December at Sh! Hoxton, 7:00-8:30 due to the fact that all the readers are snowbound! And I'm sure a good few of the listeners are too.

Same time, same place next week. The Sh! Ladiez will provide the pink fizz and plenty of Christmas cheer. And Kristina Lloyd, Scarlett French and I will don our reading voices and break out our best kink for the occasion. Hope to see you there!

Charlotte Stein's hot new novel, 'Control,' A Must Read!

2010-11-29T02:08:00.000-08:00

Be warned. 'Control’ is one of those novels. Once you’ve settled in to read Charlotte Stein’s delicious erotic romance, you won’t want to put it down until you’ve properly finished and relished every last word.

Madison Morris’s naughty bookstore, Wicked Words, seems a strange place for repressed Gabriel Kaufman to take up employment, especially when Madison’s training techniques evolve to a kinky threesome with aggressive Andy Yarrow. But Gabriel is up for the training, and they all get a lot more than they bargained for.

‘Control’ is a novel full of kinky, naughty heat with a plot that grabs you from page one and doesn’t let go until the very last satisfying sentence. ‘Control’ is sexy, funny, romantic, poignant, and always compelling. But it is the magnificent chemistry between her characters and the delicious interplay amongst them that makes Charlotte Stein’s novel truly unstoppable. Absolutely a must read.

Fannying Around Equals Woman Power

2010-11-27T09:06:00.000-08:00

I had the pleasure of attending the first meeting of the share and self-help group, Fannying Around at Sh! Portobello Thursday night. Fannying Around is the brain child of the indomitable Sarah Berry, editor of Foreplay Magazine, and all around fabulous chick. There were a dozen of us in attendance, all from varying walks of life, all bringing our various issues and personal relationships with our own fannies to the group.

It didn’t take much wine, or much prodding from Sarah before one thing became obvious; we women want to talk about our fannies and our sexuality. As we all laughed and shared, it also became obvious that we all remembered times in our lives when we felt alone, when we felt it wasn’t safe to share, when we kept our feelings,our questions and our thoughts about our sexuality to ourselves.

I found myself thinking about the ancient tale that rears its head in multiple forms, but the two most memorable are The Wife of Bath’s Tale in The Canterbury Tales, and The Wedding of Sir Gawain and Dame Ragnell. In both stories a knight is forced to marry a hideous hag. On their wedding night, the hag offers her bridegroom the choice to have her lovely in the marriage bed for his eyes only and hideous during the day, or to have her lovely during the daytime for the eyes of the world while reverting to a hag at night. In both tales the knight leaves the choice to his bride. Because he gives her the choice, she rewards him by always being beautiful. When I first read these stories, I remember thinking how interesting it was that the true beauty of a woman comes through when she has a voice, when she gets to choose. There’s nothing beautiful about victim-hood nor about being powerless. And when our voices are not heard, we are powerless.

Thursday night, the basement of Sh! was electric when female power, with female voices sharing and being heard and affirmed by each other. And the beauty was as evident as the power. Afterward, a good group of us took all that beauty and all that power right on over to the local pub and continued on.

The Fannying Around group will meet once a month starting in January. I plan to be a regular. I love being around powerful, vocal, beautiful women.

Rude Read Heats Up Deep Freeze

2010-11-27T02:56:00.000-08:00

Yesterday evening Raymond and I bundled up against the sub-zero weather and headed for London and Sh! Portobello for the Rude Read, which was very rude, indeed. I think it's safe to say that, for a couple of hours, the Sh! Shop was the steamiest place on Portobello Road.

The best thing about reading at the Sh! shops is all the fabulous new people I meet, and last night was no exception. There were people who had found out about the Rude Read from 'what's happening in London' websites, people who simply love Sh! as much as Raymond and I do, other erotica writers, and even mystery people who sipped fizz, listened, asked questions, and slipped back into the deep freeze that was London before I got the chance to meet them properly. I think it is safe to say that a good time was had by all. I know I certainly had fun, but then I always do when I'm reading from The Initiation of Ms Holly. Add to that signing books, meeting people, and fondling some of the wonderful Sh! toys and goodies. What more could an erotica-writing chick ask?

If you missed the fun, not to worry, the Kinky Christmas read at the Hoxton Sh! is next Friday. As well as reading, I'll get to listen while two of my erotica-writing heroines, Kristina Lloyd and Scarlett French read hot kink guaranteed to warm more than your heart. I, for one, can't wait!

Kinky Christmas Read Friday 3 December at Sh! Hoxton!

2010-11-24T08:20:00.000-08:00

Feeling a bit bah humbug this Christmas season? A little pink fizz and smut will get you right in the spirit, and I know just the place.

Join Kristina Lloyd, Scarlett French, yours truly and the Sh! Ladiez at Sh!, Hoxton for a little Christmas Kink. Be sure to put Friday, 3rd December on your calendar and stop in 7:00- 8:30 pm for a glass of fizz and a free Christmas treat while Kristina, Scarlett and I read kinky stories guaranteed to take away the winter chill.

We've all been looking through our stories for just the perfect kink to usher in the holiday season. We promise everything from hot, dark and twisted to randy tongue-in-cheek romance(not saying whose tongue or whose cheek:) There'll be steel dildos, Christmas crackers, leather, and lots more. Come join the fun!

Erotica 2010 and Flying Xcite Books

2010-11-21T09:33:00.000-08:00

I’m just back from Erotica 2010 with my book-signing hand well-exercised and my throat still raw from talking writing and books and kink. This was my first Erotica, and I don’t intend to make it my last.

I hooked up with the fabulous Kay Jaybee (who came from faraway places to join the party) at Earl’s Court tube station after we’d both run the gauntlet from flat tyres to delays on trains to tube closures due to weekend engineering works. We dropped our things at our hotel, had lunch then headed over to Olympia and the main event.

We just had time for a quick look around before the book signing. A quick look around was no easy task in such a large venue with such a variety of exhibits. Our recci took in everything from latex to corsets to photography, from art to jewelry to sex toys, from whips to dungeon kit to full body painting. After writing The Initiation of Ms Holly’s hot biker bloke, Morgan, I was especially keen on watching an artist clothing her lovely colleague in a freshly painted coat of leopard spots. There was something for everyone. If the booths and displays weren’t enough, there were on-going live performances headlined by Dita VonTeese.

The Xcite Books Booth was near one of the main corridors between exhibits, the perfect place to view the parade of people in latex and corsets, collars and leather, leashes and shoes! Wow, the shoes! There were stilettos and platforms and bum-high boots and biker boots in every colour and style imaginable.

The Xcite booth was well-personed with its fearless leader, Hazel Cushion at the helm. Miranda Forbes was there, as always, doing the work of two or three people. Two lovely young women handed out flyers for free audio downloads, or as Hazel calls them, eargasms. And the book racks and displays practically writhed with a constant influx of stilletoed, booted, corseted, latexed folk, as well as a good number of people dressed up like average Brits out for a day of fun and entertainment. The atmosphere was laid back and festive.

I settled in at a signing table decked in an Xcite table cloth and stacked artfully with gorgeous golden copies of The Initiation of Ms Holly. Once I’d made myself comfy, I retrieved my special blue book signing pen from the depths of my bag and did a few warm-up stretches to prepare my fingers for my first ever official book signing event.

And sign I did! I lost count fairly early on, enjoying the banter about costumes and sexy Christmas gifts, about what inspired me to write Holly and what people were enjoying most at Erotica. In the midst of it all, Kay, who had gone exploring, brought back periodic reports of her adventures and inspiration amid the exhibits.

Back from a short break, Hazel brought me an icy beer to quench my raging thirst from all that hard signing and talk, and one of the lovely Eargasm Chix thoughtfully brought both Kay and me a gourmet cookies to sustain us.

Once the signing was done and my energy was restored by alcohol and sugar, there was more exploring to do. Then it was time to watch Dita Von Teese. We watched the show from the mezzanine of the food court ensconced next to a lovely lady with a huge raven tattoo peeking up over the back of her silver corset.

After a day full of obstacles, eye-candy, book-signing, and sensory overload, we ended up back at the hotel talking writing and erotica over a bottle of Chilean red. The perfect end to the perfect day.

As I sit here in the quiet of my lounge, bleary-eyed from lack of sleep and still trying to take in the fullness of the day, I’m thinking about Hazel, who spent another long day today working the Xcite Booth at Erotica. Of course the way the books were flying off the racks, she may have run out of stock and had to close up shop early. Thanks, Hazel and Mirandas and Eargasm Chix for doing such a fabulous job! You all rock!

On a final note, as I was waiting to catch my train back home, I decided to check out the WH Smiths, and to my delight, I found Holly has arrived at Waterloo Station too, and she's all ready to travel!

It was a really good weekend!

Book Signing at Erotica 2010!

2010-11-14T04:24:00.000-08:00

This Saturday, at Erotica 2010 I'll be checking out the goodies and fondling leather and corsets all in the name of research for more hot stories. But at 3:00 pm, I'll be having even more fun signing copies of The Initiation of Ms Holly at the Xcite Books booth. If you're in the London area, be sure to stop by, do a little fondling of your own and get your copy of The Initiation of Ms Holly signed by moi. Erotica and the Xcite booth are very hot places to be on a crisp autumn day.

The Initiation of Ms Holly

Book signing

Saturday 20 November 2010

Erotica 2010

3:00 pm

Xcite Books Booth

The Business of Pleasure: A spanking good read

2010-11-11T01:49:00.000-08:00

When Charlotte Steele scrapes together the money for the sex fantasy of a lifetime from a secretive organization called The Number, she never imagines that she will end up working there beneath the disciplined tutelage of Mr. Bryant and Mr. Collins. It's a rough, but exciting ride for Charlotte as the three plan and execute fantasies for exclusive clientele, and in the process discover a few secret fantasies they hadn't counted on. Justine Elyot never fails to deliver a red hot story full of intricate, horny kink.

Her novel, The Business of Pleasure is no exception. From the very beginning we are drawn, along with Charlotte, away from her work-a-day routine onto a roller coaster ride that is the dark, secretive world of BDSM and kink, the world The Number creates for their clients. That world is richly drawn and sexy as hell, a world too steamy not to boil over into Charlotte's everyday life. The Business of Pleasure is a spanking good read on every level!

Be sure to visit Justine at The House of Elyot to learn more.

More on Sexuality, Spirituality and Creativity with Dr Dick

2010-11-08T02:28:00.000-08:00

Be sure to catch Part two of Dr Dick's interview with me on his fabulous series, The Erotic Mind. Dr Dick tells me that the first half of our our interview was a big hit, and tons of people downloaded to hear us talk about the creative process and healing the rift between sexuality and spirituality. If you missed it, tune in, catch up, and find out why so many people are having a listen.

Dr Dick is a Clinical Sexologist in private practice in Seattle. He has been a practitioner of Sex Therapy and Relationship Counseling for 30 years. He believes in affirming the fundamental goodness of sexuality in human life, both as a personal need and as an interpersonal bond. Plus he's an all-around great bloke!

Holly has Arrived at Terminal Five!

2010-11-08T01:49:00.000-08:00

My darling Husband took this great photo at a W H Smith in Heathrow Terminal Five. Being my PR person extraordinaire, he stealthily rearranged the shelf so three other anthologies in which I have stories are nestled up beside The Initiation of Ms Holly. I suspected Holly would be there. Understanding the joy of seeing our babies on the shelves, as only another writer can, Justine Elyot told me she had seen it in Gatwick. Naturally I was anxious for photographic evidence of Holly in the airport, ready to entertain and titillate travelers on their long flights.

As I look at the photo, I have to smile. Several years ago, I had the privilege of attending a martial arts camp in Poland with the fabulous poet, scholar, kick-ass martial-artist, and all around great bloke, Afaa Weaver. In the airport at Krackow waiting to catch our flights home, we checked out the book shelves in one of the shops, as writers do. He graciously listened to me go on and on about the novel I was writing. When I finally took time out to breathe, he ran a hand along a shelf of books and told me, half joking, that once your book appears in the airport shops, you’ve arrived. Mind you, Afaa is someone who arrived long before I even realized there was a journey to be made. But I am so there now! In W H Smiths. In Terminal Five. (See photographic evidence.)

Airports are always places in flux, places of comings and goings. Arrival is also departure to new destinations as well as coming home. Airports are places of beginnings and endings. The Initiation of Ms Holly is on the shelf, and The Pet Shop is in the making. I have arrived at the airport. Now the actually journey begins. I can hardly wait to see where it takes me. I’m sure Afaa would see the poetry in this arrival.

The Pet Shop is on its way!

2010-11-05T10:55:00.000-07:00

I'm celebrating great news! Xcite Books will be publishing my second novel, The Pet Shop, in the UK October 2011, and in the US and Canada January 2012.

Here's just a tiny peek of what you'll find inside The Pet Shop:

When STELLA JAMES jokingly blames her lack of a sex life on her demanding new job with the STRIGIDA COMPANY, a human Pet from the mysterious PET SHOP isn’t exactly the solution she had in mind. But Strigida sends her, TINO, complete with a collar, a leash, and an erection, and Stella discovers that the pleasure of keeping Pets, especially this Pet, is extremely addicting, and anything but simple.

The Pet Shop is a modern retelling of Beauty and the Beast but the jury is still out on which is which.

Talking Sexuality, Spirituality and Creativity with Dr. Dick

2010-11-01T08:51:00.001-07:00

I'm very excited to be Dr. Dick's guest for the next two weeks on his fabulous podcast series The Erotic Mind. I recently discovered The Erotic Mind series, and I'm definitely hooked! Dr Dick and I talk about sex and religion and the creative process and lots of other exciting topics.

Part 2 of Dr Dick's interview with me will be 8th November. Put it on your calendar.

Don't miss Dr. Dick's other two on-going interview series, Sex Edge-U-cation, and Sex Wisdom.

Biology is a Bitch! Bring on the Erotica!

2010-11-01T08:21:00.000-07:00

In the now notorious interview with Attitude Magazine, Stephen Fry may or may not have been joking in saying that straight men feel they "disgust" women, who only have sex because that "is a price they are willing to pay for a relationship." Apparently Fry is on record as also being of the opinion that women don't really like sex. If they did, they would "go to Hampstead Heath and meet strangers to shag behind a bush."

The remarks and the uproar they’ve caused make me wonder how much value can be placed on any comment about women’s attitudes toward sex without taking into account the fact that biology is a bitch.

Women are practical. Women count the cost. And with the biological cost so high, it’s not surprising that women’s approach to sex tends to be a little more cautious then men's. I’d like to mention just two of those biological biggies that should be taken into consideration before attempting to expound upon woman’s attitudes toward sex.

1. Women can, and often do get pregnant, while on the other hand, men do not. It takes a man… well not very long, to father a child, an act he can easily and often repeat at will with very little consequence.

Biology, however, has designed women with a propensity toward pregnancy. That same pesky imperative to pass on the genes to the next generation which may compel a man to scatter his seed far and wide demands that a woman incubate and nest and raise. For women, that involves nine months of carrying a child inside her body at considerable danger to her own health. And that’s just the beginning. According to an article in the Guardian, in the U.K. the cost of raising a child to age 21 is now a staggering ₤200,000! Not wonder most women aren't anxious to tackle this alone.

2. Size is everything! Men are bigger, and stronger than women. Women are only about half as strong as men in the upper body, and about two-thirds as strong in the lower. Top that off with a good dose of testosterone for added aggression, and it’s not too difficult to see why most women would think twice before joining a shag fest in the shrubs.

For women sex will always be a calculated risk. It sucks, but it’s true. It doesn’t mean we want it any less, or think about it any less often, or need it any less than men do.

The tremendous rise in sales of erotica for women is evidence to just how much women do think about sex. Biology may be a bitch, but erotica is our friend. And, being practical, women are aware that ertocia is a sexual outlet for which there is no risk of pregnancy, no risk of rape or violence, and no ₤200,000, twenty-one year price tag. Women may not be shagging in the shrubbery, but it’s pretty clear, women most definitely DO love sex, and think about it often.

Another Rude Reading from The Initiation of Ms Holly 26th November at Sh! Portobello!

2010-10-25T03:03:00.000-07:00

Mark your calendars Friday 26th November -- Reading at Sh! Portobello by yours truly from my novel, The Initiation of Ms Holly.

If you missed the fun at the launch party for The Initiation of Ms Holly at Sh! Hoxton store, not to worry. Here is another chance to enjoy some of the best and the rudest bits from Holly. And it's my chance to read to you from the legendary Pink Throne at the Sh! Portobello Store. Plus we all get to party with the fabulous Sh! Ladiez. A hot evening to take the autumn chill off.

More juicy details to follow shortly!

Best Launch Party EVER!

2010-10-16T09:25:00.000-07:00

Friday night we celebrated the launch of The Initiation of Ms Holly in style at Sh! Women's Erotic Emporium, Hoxton. The traditional Sh! pink fizz and cupcakes were the grazing fare of the evening, along with a lovely, and appropriately pink and scrummy banana cake that my dear friend, Helen Calaghan, made just for the occasion.

We started the evening early with a pre-launch drink at the Bluu Bar right next door to Sh! It was the perfect place to meet up with old friends and new ones too before the bash began. I headed over a little early to get into the Killer Shoes, touch up the lippy and generally get in raunchy reading mood.

It was an all-star cast. The lovely Triona Adams, of Nun the Wiser fame was there for Holly's maiden voyage. And I felt expecially honoured to be able to celebrate with some of my very favourite erotica writers, Kay Jaybee, Jacqueline Applebee, Scarlett French, Kate Marley, and

Lucy Felthouse. Lucy is the founder of the exciting new website, Erotica For All, one of the best things to happen to erotic readers and writers in ages! If you haven't checked it out, do so.

The totally amazing Hazel Cushion, managing director and founder of Accent Press , of which Xcite books is apart, was also there. I can't thank her enough for all she's done to make The Initiation of Ms Holly a reality. Hazel, you rock!

Speaking of people who rock, the fabulous Sarah Berry, editor and all-around fearless leader of Foreplay Magazine was there. Her enthusiasm and passion for erotica and writing are inspirational.

For two and a half wonderful hours Holly had a fizz-flushed captive audience. I read some of my favourite raunchy passages, answered questions, signed books and in general had a fantastic time. When people weren't listening to me read the sexy bits they were wandering about, browsing the pink, toy-filled, fun-filled shelves of Sh! women's store, while the lovely Sh! Ladiez kept the fizz and cupcakes and pink banana cake circulating.

Afterwards, the party overflowed to a nearby Pizza Express where we ravenous partiers discuss writing and sex and networking and fun-stuff in general. The party ended up being only slightly less than a slumber party as Kay, Sarah and Raymond and I migrated back to the hotel room still talking writing, raunch and censorship.

Back home now, having had twelve much-needed hours of sleep, I'm still smiling all over myself. I can hardly wait for the next launch party. That means, back to work on the next novel, and lots more fun!

Special thanks to Lucy Felthouse for some of

the fantastic photos. Lucy, you're the best!

A TASTE OF HOLLY

Excerpts of The Initiation of Ms Holly are now available for your reading pleasure at Erotica for All and at Xcite Books.

WIN HOLLY

For a chance to win your free copy of The Initiation of Ms Holly, check out Eriotica For All and the Goodreads Xcite group.

Sex and Ritual

2010-10-12T14:20:00.000-07:00

Carl Jung saw symbols and rituals as containers for numinous power. It’s a small step from our need for ritual to the idea of sex as ritual. It infiltrates our myths, it permeates our literature, and it fills our fantasies. Many of the earliest religious rites were fertility rites involving either the sacred prostitute or the sacred couple whose sexual union insured abundant crops, cattle and children for another season. Certainly it’s not hard to see the ritualistic aspect of sex in the natural world. We’ve all watched birds or badgers or elephants going at it on nature programs. There are often complex courtship rituals before actual copulation.

Jung’s definition of ritual as a container for power intrigues me. The power contained in sex is astounding. It’s the power to pass on life. It gives us the ‘little death’ and the out of body experience. It elevates us to the level of heaven while bringing us back to our most primitive animal nature.

Sex is the ultimate mystical experience. The closest we can get to a power beyond ourselves is the power within ourselves. I chose to write The Initiation of Ms Holly as a modern day retelling of the Psyche and Eros story with that in mind. In the Greek myth, Psyche must undergo ritualistic tasks before she is allowed to be with her lover Eros. In achieving these impossible tasks, Psyche so impresses the gods that they not only allow her to be with her lover, but grant her divinity as well.

In Greek mythology sex usually involves one of the gods, most often Zeus, coming down to earth and ‘seducing’ a mortal female, who then gives birth to a child destined to do great things. Sex as the representation of the creative force permeates the Greek myths. It’s there in the Christian myth as well, the child of divinity and humanity destined to save the world. Tragically the power of sex is omitted from the Christian myth.

More than a procreative force, sex is a creative force. Its ritual act allows us contact with the power, contact we can have no other way. But who controls the ritual? We’ve all seen lories transporting heavily reinforced tankers bearing CAUTION: HAZARDOUS MATERIALS signs in big red letters. We know a breech of containment would be disastrous. The purpose of ritual is to keep the power contained so we mortals can interact with it safely. Religions have always tried to control the rituals involving sex, to dictate with whom the act may occur, how, and even when it may take place. Property and inheritance rights depend on controlling women’s sexuality. Even the Facebook practice of unilaterally deleting sex positive pages is an effort to control sexuality.’

These days the ritual containers set in place by religious superstition and prejudice are being breeched. Those vessels can no longer contain and control sexuality in all its vibrant varied guises. The ritual is being taken out of the hands of institutions and reclaimed on a more individual, more personal level. That means the creative force of our sexuality is being freed in ways we could have hardly imagined a few years ago.

Yesterday was Coming Out Day. My Facebook page was full of well wishers and messages reassuring our young people that it gets better. Now more than ever there are safe places to learn about, understand and explore all aspects of our sexuality. And we are much less likely to settle for some ‘authority figure’ telling us what is sexually acceptable. Taking back the power is never easy. The journey is a long one, and we’re not there yet, but I’m delighted to say, I see reason to hope.

Female Sexual FUNctionality

2010-10-06T15:46:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday I got a call from Jenny Stocks from the Daily Mail asking me about the use of erotic literature to enhance women’s sex lives. Her article, Give Your Libido a Boost, is in today's edition. It is about natural alternatives to the new ‘female Viagra.' I’ve been following the news about the big pharma-cure for the ever-nebulous female sexual dysfunction awhile now.

I think any discussion of female sexual dysfunction has to take into account the way the culture shapes how we women see ourselves sexually. One episode of Mad Men is enough to have us all cringing, thankful that we live in a more enlightened time.

And indeed, the news the past few days has been all about the big sex survey in the States. Everyone seems to be having more sex, being more adventurous in the sex they have, and having more orgasms. Yet, we’ve elevated female sexual dysfunction to the level of a disease, and the pharmaceutical companies have rushed in with the big drug cure.

Would that it were that simple, but we have a nasty tendency to base our expectations of ourselves and our sexuality on what magazine adverts, television commercials and films present to us as the ideal woman, airbrushed, deodorized, glamourized, and always ready for mad, passionate sex with her own personal version of Brad Pitt or Clive Owen. That would be clean, unmessy sex, in case you’re wondering. Our make-up would never be smudged, and our hair would never be mussed. We would be comfortable in suicide stilettos and under-wire bras that double as torture devices. Oh, and did I mention the glamourous career and the perfect 2.2 children? If we can’t manage all the above with grace and aplomb and still be horny on demand, then surely we must need a cure.

To add to the insanity, we have the religious right homophobically preaching sexual purity, and submission to husbands. What, no husband? Find one, and forever keep your hands out of your knickers. We have the feminist anti-porn brigade shouting the anti-women, turn-our-children-into-serial-killers evils of porn from a platform almost totally devoid of fact.

Do you feel crazy, yet? I know I do.

Jenny’s article covers the gamut of drug-free ways to boost female libido, from couples’ therapists to psychologists, from personal trainers to erotic boutique owners to sexy literature. All this brings us back to how we women see ourselves sexually.

As a young girl, I navigated my way through the minefield of female sexuality in the safe pages of books, Cosmo magazine and the odd copy of Playboy or Penthouse I found stuffed away in bedside tables I wasn't supposed to be snooping in. I didn’t self-combust, I didn’t become a serial killer, my fingers didn’t fall off, and I didn’t go blind. What did happen is that I discovered what I like, what gives me pleasure. And I discovered that it was okay to own that part of me and to share it.

It’s difficult for any woman to see her way clear of all the rhetoric and propaganda, to be able to look openly and honestly at her own sexuality and understand it, be comfortable with it. Instead of the massive hand-out of drugs to treat female sexual dysfunction, maybe what we really need is just a safe place to explore our female sexual function instead. I have a sneaking suspicion that in a lot of cases, the function is still there, it just needs a little safe, playful coaxing.

The Initiation of Ms Holly now available on Kindle

2010-10-03T09:58:00.000-07:00

The Initiation of Ms Holly is now available for download on Kindle at Amazon along with a really yummy free sample.

The Initiation of Ms Holly for UK Kindle users

The Initiation of Ms Holly for US Kindle users

An unseasonal heatwave just waiting to happen.

The Initiation of Ms Holly now available!

2010-09-26T08:28:00.000-07:00

If you're in the UK, you can now order The Initiation of Ms Holly in epub, pdf, and print formats! If you're in the US (sigh!) you'll have to wait a little longer for print.

However, if you are in the States and don't want to wait for The Initiation of Ms Holly to come out in print, you can now order your epub or pdf copy at Xcite Books!

Order now and find out what really goes on at The Mount.

Amazon UK is also taking pre-orders for the print version.

Burlesque: Women in Control

2010-09-24T09:23:00.000-07:00

Last night I participated in an introduction to burlesque class taught by the fabulous Tempest Rose, one of the famous Kitten Club kittens. A group of eight women gathered at Sh! Women’s Erotic Emporium off Hoxton Square. Most of us only really knew that Burlesque involves beautiful costumes, sometimes strip tease and stage performances, all done by very sexy women. We spent the evening learning to shimmy, and bump and grind, learning to use our bodies and faces to convey our emotions, and learning about the costumes and props of burlesque. (I’m pretty sure Sh! had a last-minute run on nipple tassels at the end of the evening.) The class culminated in our ‘graduation exercise’ -- a glove strip-tease. The glove was the only item of clothing removed during the evening. (Unless you count a pair of VERY uncomfortable, nose-bleed stilettos that got tossed in the corner after a few attempts at bump and grind.)

I had no idea a simple glove could be such a sensual tool, nor that it could convey so much. Tempest told us that though strip tease is often apart of burlesque, a burlesque performer never takes off everything. In fact, a burlesque performer views the items of her costume as props rather than clothing. She said she begins a performance with some props, and by the end of the performance, she has less props.

The literal meaning of burlesque is to ‘send up,’ or to make a joke of. Its literary forms can be traced back to Chaucer’s bawdy Canterbury Tales. According to Wikipedia, Burlesque is a humorous theatrical entertainment involving parody and sometimes grotesque exaggeration. Burlesque sometimes parodies the higher performance arts – ballet, opera, poetry. It often, parodies the male and female relationship, and usually at the expense of the blokes. The form is often associated with a variety show and striptease.

What makes burlesque unique, according to Tempest, is that female sensuality and the female form are always at the centre of burlesque. What I found most striking about the evening, as I did the first time I saw Tempest introducing an audience to burlesque at Sh! Portobello, was the sensual female power that is the driving force of burlesque. That power was the reason I wanted to learn more. Tempest told us that in burlesque, the woman is always in control. It is in her power to reveal or conceal what she chooses in her own time. When curves and female sensuality are emphasized, the result is not only beautiful, but also very powerful.

Tempest demonstrated to us how female control in burlesque is shown in the stances and the movements of the performer. She showed us how the angular, sensual stances emphasized in burlesque showcase the female form, emphasizing sensuality and curves. The result is an art form that is 100% female powered. And the sense of that power appeals to both men and women.

She contrasted that to what a stripper might do at a strip club, where the stances are open and straight on, emphasizing what is between the legs. The movements suggest the sex act itself, and emphasizing a man’s point of view.

It was a girl-powered evening, with each of us showcasing our own unique female sensuality. There was pink fizz, silky gloves, corsets, lace, and laughter, and at the centre of it all we were in control. As a woman writing erotica for women, I like that a lot.

The Initiation of Ms Holly launch 15 October!

2010-09-20T08:34:00.000-07:00

15 October, 18:00-20:00 at Sh! Women's Erotic Emporium, my novel, The Initiation of Ms Holly, published by the award-winning Xcite Books, will be officially launched! Finally I'll get to introduce Rita Holly and Edward Ellison and their mysterious world of The Mount to the public. I'm convinced it will be love at first sight. Or in this case, love at first listen. I'll be reading just a few of the yummy bits, just enough to convince you that you absolutely must take Rita and Edward and all of their friends home with you.

The lovely Sh! Ladiez will make sure there are plenty of copies to take home, along with pink fizz and cupcakes to refresh you while you listen and browse through all the cool stuff Sh! has to offer. Make sure to RSVP with Sh! as space is limited. Or on the launch Face Book page for The Initiation of Ms Holly

RSVP now, then come and see what really goes on at The Mount.

Educating KD

2010-08-26T06:48:00.000-07:00

Though it may sound like it, 'Educating KD' isn't the title of my next novel or of a hot new short story. It's just a good description of what happened to me yesterday evening at the Hoxton Sh! Women's Erotic Emporium.

Writing erotica is a constant sex education. I'm always learning something new, and I often find myself amazed at the many facets of human sexuality. A lot of my stories involve a bit of punishment for bad behaviour (or lack thereof), and that punishment is often a soundly applied spanking. Even people who might not want it as apart of their own bedroom play may still enjoy reading erotic stories that involve spanking. There's something very primal about it, something as basic as trusting the person with the power, or even abdicating that power willingly, which makes it an excellent topic for sexy stories. All manner of wild and forbidden things can happen when someone else is wielding the riding crop.

I arrived a little before the 6:30 start time to have a warm cuppa, dry out from the rain, and look around at all the fun toys and gifts and the great selection of erotic books. When it was time, the manager, Joanna, and her new assistant manager, Ludi, ushered me downstairs where all the classes are taught. Downstairs is also where the famous pink velvet settee is. That's where writers get to sit and read sexy stories when Sh! has book readings. But this wasn't a setee sort of evening. A table was laid in the centre of the room with a full array of spanking impliments, all in pretty girlie colours, along with some smart black PVC and leather thrown in for fun.

As I sipped pink fizz, the Sh! Chix demonstrated the use of spankers, floggers, two-tails, crops, cat-o-nine-tails, and the age-old favourite -- the human hand. There was a lovely bull-whip, but lack of space and expertise (definitely a don't-try-this-at-home sort of toy) meant I was only allowed to fondle it. I'm told that often some of the larger whips and floggers are used more for the impressive explosive cracking sound they make when striking a pillow or a bed, or a pink setee. I was impressed! They can also be used simply to stroke, tease, and caress.

Joanna tells me that spanking releases tension, and the release of that tension can often come in the form of crying or laughing, then the body responds with a flood of endorphins, probably the real reason why spanking is so popular.

By the end of the evening I'd had a chance to flog and be flogged, spank and be spanked, and I felt like I had a much better understanding of the anatomy of a spanking. Since this was introductory spanking through the comfy padding of my jeans, I didn't experience the endorphin rush, but I got something better. I got to go upstairs and shop afterward!

Mammoth Book of Threesomes and Moresomes on sale in UK now and soon in US too!

2010-08-22T10:01:00.000-07:00

The long-awaited Mammoth Book of Threesomes and Moresomes, edited by Linda Alvarez, is now available in the UK. It contains my sizzling story, Flash Fire, in which two hot firemen, come to the aide of a sexy photographer in her efforts to educate her innocent young assistant in matters that have nothing to do with cameras, but have lots to do with fire.

For erotica lovers in the States, don't worry, Mammoth Book of Threesomes and Moresomes will be available in the US October 5, but you can pre-order now. Thirty-six steamy stories by some of erotica's top writers. You won't want to miss this one.

Fantasies

2010-07-31T03:48:00.000-07:00

Grab a scrap of paper and a pen and write down very briefly and generally your top ten erotic fantasies.

Have you done it?

Good. Now let’s compare.

According to AskMen.com, women’s top ten fantasies are just as raunchy as men’s. No surprise there. I’ve always maintained that we women have much dirtier minds than men do. Unfortunately, we’ve been socialized on a huge diet of guilt and self-doubt where sex is concerned. The good news is we’re doing our best, in spite of the opposition, to overcome.

Most of the top shelf erotica now in main stream book stores, as well as online, is erotica written for, and by women, and a lot of it blends great story-telling with blow-your-hair-back, burst-into-flame, nuclear sex. If you want the skinny on what goes on in our very dirty minds, women’s erotica is the place to look, and what a fun place it is!

So here it is. According the AskMen, the list of fantasies in reverse order are: dominating and being dominated, teacher/student, sex with a stranger, threesomes - MFM, FMF, voyeurism, force fantasies, exhibitionism, private dancer.

There they are, ladies, our faves. How accurate is the list? I can only speak for myself, but based on the women’s erotica I’ve read, and written, I was surprised to find being a private dancer at the top of the list. I was equally surprised that girl-on-girl wasn’t on the list. I would have also expected to find spanking and punishment in the mix, although I’m sure most of us can slot those in nicely in the teacher/student category, or dominating and being dominated.

Most of the fantasies on Ask Men’s list (and a fair few not on the list) I have written about in my short fiction and in The Initiation of Ms Holly. I’m not sure how Ask Men came up with their list, but based on the women’s erotica I’ve read and written, my list would have been similar. How about yours?

IN OTHER NEWS: A big BOOOO goes out to Facebook this week for deleting the 3,000 + member sex-positive women’s empowerment group, “Our Porn, Ourselves” founded by Violet Blue. Sadly, the above-mentioned opposition we women are constantly battling is alive and well.

Taking back our sexuality and owning and understanding it is an ongoing battle, one in which, unfortunately, we women are often our own worst enemies. Asertions aren't facts, and zeal is no substitute for truth. Thanks, Suzanne Forbes and Carnal Nation for reminding us.

Sh! Portobello Store launch -- Holly's First Public Debute!

2010-07-24T13:45:00.000-07:00

Thursday night was the big launch of the long awaited Sh! Women's Erotic Emporium Portobello Store, and it was even more fun than anticipated! If there was a theme to the evening, I'd have to say it was girl power. It always amazes me how strong and appealing women are when they're comfortable in their own skin and comfortable with their own sexuality. And Thursday night's launch was definitely a gathering of powerful, sexy women.

It was great fun browsing the latest and coolest toys and books and chatting with my fellow erotica writers as well as the actresses and burlesque beauties. The who's who of girl power extraordinaire also included Suraya Sidhu Singh, editor-in-chief of Filament Magazine as well as Sarah Berry, Editor of Foreplay Magazine, formerly Forum.

The amazing, Kay Jaybee read her hot story, 'Searching for Her,' from Violet Blue's award-winning erotic anthology for couples, Sweet Love Definitely an anthology to add to your collection. The fabulous Scarlet French read her story, 'In the Garden of Eden ' from the anthology, Fantasy: Untrue Stories of Lesbian Passion , a sexy fantasy inspired by her time working as a Sh! girl. I hear Scarlet is about to launch her exciting new website.

In addition to hot stories read by hot chix, we all got to enjoy Delores Deluxe and Tempest Rose from the fabulous Kitten Club Burlesque Cabaret I have it on good authority that Delores is going to be teaching classes for Sh! very soon. Definitely sign me up! Three words -ostritch feather fans!

Of course, for me, the highlight of the evening was my chance to give a titilating taste of my novel The Initiation of Ms Holly It was exciting to finally share a little bit of the story that I've been living with in my head for the last year, and to such an appreciative audience. It was my chance to proudly parade Rita and Edward and introduce them to some really good friends -- all of whom seemed to agree that chocolate and sex are definitely a good combo. Remember, you can pre-order your copy of The Initiation of Ms Holly on Amazon now.

Sorry there are no photos of all the fun at Sh! Portobello, but as with any new venture, there are always a few glitches. Just as Kay Jaybee was starting her reading, the lights went out -- only downstairs where the entertainment was. Upstairs where people milled about browsing the hot selection of books and sex toys and corsets and boas and whips and...sigh, well you get the picture, the lights were fine. As it turned out, an evening's entertainment of sexy stories, and burlesque by lamp and candle light was very atmospheric -- especially when accompanied with lots of fizz and cup cakes!

Also beautifully present at the Sh! launch were the cast from the fabulous play, Five Clever Courtesans, written by the very talented Sarah Blake. Raymond and I were lucky enough to catch the Sunday night performance at the Vibe Bar on Brick Lane just before the ladies all head off to the Edinburgh Fringe, where the play is already rated number nine out of the top forty Fringe acts. No trouble seeing why! The play is witty, educational, sexy and very moving. Break a leg in Edinburgh, Courtesans!

Every time I visit Sh!, I make new friends and have a really great time. Thursday night was no exception -- with or without the lights. Thanks Sh! Chix, for a great time!

Twice the Sh!, Twice the pleasure!

2010-06-25T05:21:00.000-07:00

Too much of a good thing is even better! Sh! Women's Erotic Emporium is opening a new shop in London on Portabello Road! If one shop was great, two will be amazing! The big launch celebration is 22nd July. Not only do I get to be there, but I get to read from my soon to be released novel, The Initiation of Ms Holly. I'll be joined by Kay Jaybee, Scarlet French and Jacqueline Applebee These three fab writers will also be sharing their steamy stories and titillating tales. Congratulations Sh! We can't wait!

In pursuit of Orgasm: Mara Altman reads from her book, "Thanks For Coming" (video)

2010-06-25T05:15:00.000-07:00

'The Butt, The Butt: It's the Responsible Thing To Do" Chat with Author, Mara Altman (video)

Exposure

2010-06-25T05:03:00.000-07:00

I recently had the pleasure of critting my friend, Helen Callaghan’s exciting new time travel novel, Sleepwalker. Though, I have to admit, I had so much fun reading it, I had to remind myself that I was supposed to be ‘being critical.’ Later, as we discussed the book, she surprised me by saying how relieved she was that I had liked the love scenes. She had been concerned that perhaps they didn’t work. They did. Beautifully.

Writers are neurotic about writing sex and romance – even those of us who do it all the time. Lots of writers either claim they can’t write sexy love scenes or they don’t like to. That’s fair enough. I don’t like to write crime investigation scenes. But unfortunately this sex and romance -ophobia often leads to dismissing anything romantic or sexy as not worthy to be considered serious writing, therefore not worth writing.

Writing fiction to share with anyone less indifferent than the cat is a bit like exposing oneself on High Street. We writers are never more exposed, more vulnerable than when we offer up a nice, fat slice of our inner workings. And that’s exactly what happens when anyone attempts fiction. No matter how unconscious it may be, it’s all about me, Me MEEEE! And now that I’ve written it all down… um, er, gosh, I hope you like it. Please like it!

Since I know it’s all about me, the real issue in my neurotic little mind is what conclusions readers will draw as to just HOW it’s all about me? I expect people to be bright enough to know that I’m not the secret agent, the lawyer, the prima ballerina, the space ship captain that I write about. Yet, why is it that if I write one sex scene peppered with a bit of romance, I suddenly fear everyone will believe K D really DOES steal vegetables for lewd purposes, or that K D really IS hopelessly obsessed with the gardener? And is that such a bad thing? When the fiction I write deals with the emotions that revolve around sex and love, I feel more vulnerable, more exposed, somehow more flawed.

In a wonderful essay on why he likes to write about sex, Wallace Shaw writes, “If I'm unexpectedly reminded that my soul and body are capable of being totally swept up in a pursuit and an activity that pigs, flies, wolves, lions and tigers also engage in, my normal picture of myself is violently disrupted. In other words, consciously, I'm aware that I'm a product of evolution, and I'm part of nature. But my unconscious mind is still partially wandering in the early 19th century and doesn't know these things yet.

Writing sex and romance is that unexpected reminder that we can be swept away in our animal passions just like all the rest of our animal cousins. That implies a loss of control, an unfitness for civilized society. Banishment from the social group is an age-old punishment for what is considered improper behaviour in the tribe, what is considered ‘uncivilized.’ Though we may no longer be sent into the wilderness to fend for ourselves with only a rusty knife, the archetypal fear of being ostracized still remains.

A writing teacher told me once that the best stories, the ones with the most power to grip, are those that come from the place inside us that makes us the most uncomfortable. The place that embarrasses us, that frightens us, the place where we have the least control, that’s the places where story begins. It’s the place where our characters come alive, the place where their love and sex and violence and fear and celebration compel the people we’ve exposed ourselves to -- our readers -- to keep reading to the end. And, hopefully, if we’ve exposed just the right bits of ourselves, those readers will eagerly come back for more.

Ms Holly is almost here!

2010-06-10T14:45:00.000-07:00

October seemed a long ways away until I went on Amazon today and discovered I'm there! Well, not me, but Rita Holly is there along with the ultra hot masked Edward and Aurora, the Enforcer and Leo, the Zoo Keeper and Vivienne and all of those other great characters I've been living with, and yes, sleeping with, for the past year. All of my writing friends, and of course my long-suffering husband, have heard me talk endlessly about this fun novel I've been writing with cool characters and sex and intrigue and motorcycles and dancing and champagne and sex and, oh yes, some romance thrown in because I'm a romantic at heart, and lots of secrets exposed and scheming and plotting and, did I mention sex?

I've had so much fun with Rita and her friends and their adventures at The Mount that I can hardly wait to share it all, and now that The Initiation of Ms Holly is on Amazon, October doesn't seem so far away. It's officially available 11 October, at which time there will be much dancing in the streets and drinking of champagne. And though even God can't get reservations at The Mount, you can! In fact, you can pre-order Rita and her friends now so you can join them at The Mount, and you'll have something hot to read during those crisp autumn nights.

Sex translates well!

2010-05-28T06:06:00.000-07:00

The Black Lace anthology, The Affair, which contains my short story, Vetting The Affair, now has a German translation! I've gone international! Whether you read it in German or English, it's a hot read for Bank Holiday weekend.

The Double Standard is alive and well

2010-05-25T02:36:00.000-07:00

I was lucky enough to meet Zoe Margolis a few months ago. Zoe, aka Abby Lee, was famously outed for her popular anonymous blog, Girl with a One Track Mind. When I met her, she was doing a book reading at Sh! Women's Shop in Hoxton promoting her new book, Girl with a One Track Mind Exposed. At the time she talked briefly about her shock and anger at being called a hooker in the headline of an article that ran in the Independent on Sunday, so I was very happy to read in Saturday's Guardian that she had won libel damages. No one doubted that she would. The headline of the article was not only defamitory, but it was also wrong. The Inedpendent has since apologized and settled out of court.

As I read the article, I couldn't help thinking about the big news a couple of months ago when Peter Biskind's book, Star, How Warren Beatty seduced America, revealed that Beatty had supposedly slept with 12,775 women -- give or take.

No one -- even mistakenly -- called Beatty a hooker. In fact the very idea is ludicrous. Men, especially handsome powerful ones, build reputations on their sexual prowess. Other men admire them, and women long to be the next notch on the bed post. Even though Beatty was referred to as a serial philanderer in one of the many newspaper articles, somehow that just doesn't have the same impact as being called a hooker.

Seldom does a woman get admired for her sexual prowess, nor does she have to sleep with anywhere near 12,775 men before she gets labeled a whore. I'm in no way denegrating sex workers. I'm simply saying that the old double standard is alive and well, no matter how sophisticated we think we may be.

I doubt if there's a woman writer of erotic fiction anywhere who doesn't empathize with Zoe. Every time I publish a new story, every time I write a blog entry, there's a frisson of fear, a small knot in my stomach, when I consider the risk. The truth is, the prudism and puritanism that's a part of the culture we all grow up in still causes me to doubt myself, and even though I know better, causes me to fear what other people might think or say. And certainly not without cause. When women are open about sex, we run the risk of being labeled slut, whore, hooker. We run the risk that those who still think sex should be the property of the patriarchy, the church and state, will see us as fair game for verbal and emotional abuse (or worse) because we've chosen to celebrate our sexuality rather than repress it.

Zoe Margolis is one of my heros. She's courageous, outspoken, and she's making a difference for all of us who believe in the celebration of sexuality. And the world could certainly use a little more cause to celebrate.

117 Miles of Inspiration

2010-05-21T03:49:00.001-07:00

We just got back from walking the Two Moors Way, also known as the Devon Coast to Coast -- Nine days of walking across the whole of Devon. We did it from Lynmouth in the north to Wembury in the South. It was 117 miles of moorland, farmland, red deer, ponies, prehistoric ruins, bluebell woods, wild garlic pathways and much more than I could ever write about in one blog entry. We were usually walking by nine-thirty in the morning and in bed by nine-thirty at night. Somehwere in the midst of blisters and aches and lovely views and gorgeous wildflowers, we developed a routine, and by the beginning of the fourth day, that routine opened into space for thinking. For me, space for thinking always means it's time to plan and scheme a new story, and certainly the inspiration was there. Now that The Initiation of Ms Holly is off to my editor, I'm constantly thinking about what comes next. With my days full of the enormous emptiness of the moors, and nothing to do but put one foot in front of the other mile after mile, whole scenes played out in my head. Charactors I'd been toying with revealed themselves more clearly, almost like they had dropped in for the day's walk, and nebulous ideas became more concrete. All that without ever setting pen to paper or fingers to keyboard.

I've always walked my stories. Whenever I reach a road block, I go for a walk, whenever I'm not sure what happens next, I go for a walk. I've just never had nine whole days to walk a story before. I'd like to say that I now have the next novel all planned out in detail, but that's not what happened. I walked across open spaces, huge open spaces, always wondering what I was missing, what I might be able to see if I just looked a little harder. I'm not sure how so much emptiness can feel so full, but it does. There's a lot out there, and even now that I'm back home, I'm still seeing what's out there. I think it's a good metaphor for what happens when I write.

I've come home to my own little enclosed space to discover that my story, Accidental Hitchhiker, is now available on the Xcite eBooks anthology, Between the Sheets. Also, my story, Muscle Bound, will be available in October in the Cleis Press anthology, Smooth: Erotic Stories for Women. A very nice homecoming, I think!

Another good eRead!

2010-05-21T03:13:00.000-07:00

On a road trip across America, Liz Martin’s car breaks down in the middle of nowhere South Dakota, and the ride a Good Samaritan lorry driver offers her is not exactly the one she expected. Don't miss my story, ACCIDENTAL HITCHHIKER, now available in Xcite eBooks anthology, Cocktales, Between The Sheets

Get Smooth this autumn

2010-05-21T02:07:00.000-07:00

It may not look like it now, but autumn is on its way, and there's nothing like a steamy story to warm you up on those crisp nights. Look for my sizzling story, MUSCLE BOUND, in Smooth, Erotic Stories for Women ,the great new anthology edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel

A crush on a body building instructor leads to a nude posing session and unexpected inspiration for a work of art. Lots of sweaty, muscley fun. You can preorder now from Amazon so you'll be well prepared to ward off the autumn chill.

HIRED HAND, just in time for National Masturbation Month!

2010-05-02T13:13:00.000-07:00

May is the month for spring flowers, birds singing in the trees, gardens sprouting, and yes it's true, May is National Masturbation Month in the States! Personally I think it's a celebration everyone should partake of wherever they live. Why limit it to just May? It's truly a celebration for all seasons.

A great way to celebrate is to download my hot new story, HIRED HAND, in Xcite Book's new ebook anthology, Six of the Best Spanking Stories 2.

Pretty city boy, Tim Harris, is the last man Suzie Sheridan would have hired to help her on the farm had he not been the only one who applied for the job. But with strict discipline generously applied in all the right places, even Suzie is amazed at just how good a hired hand Tim turns out to be.

Celebrate America's Sexuality Day

2010-03-03T00:09:00.000-08:00

Happy Sexuality Day, America! And since it's always a great idea to celebrate our sexuality, I’m inviting everyone – no matter where they live – to celebrate Sexuality Day. For those of you who don’t know, and I’m embarrassed to say I didn’t, there’s a reason why America’s Sexuality Day is March 3. It’s the historic anniversary of The Comstock Act of 1873 – a congressional act authorizing national censorship laws against sexual free speech. This piece of legislation was the brain child of a man who bragged about being responsible for 4,000 arrests and 15 suicides, Anthony Comstock.

As I read a bit of his history in Wikipedia, I was saddened to think that if he were around today, there are plenty of places where he’d fit right in, and his ideas and attitudes would be welcomed with open arms.

It’s easy to take for granted the openness of the times in which we live. As I write this, I am surrounded by books and magazines (never mind the internet) for which Mr. Comstock would have happily had me jailed. I write things every day for which I would have been jailed. And I do it without any risk to myself. Even in today’s world – maybe especially in today’s world, that’s no small thing.

To be able to celebrate our sexuality – in all its diversity -- should be one of our most basic human rights. So I encourage you to join in the celebration, wherever you are. Remember, we forget the Comstocks of the world at our own peril.

Who the Hell is Mr. Perfect?

2010-02-07T09:52:00.000-08:00

Mr. Perfect doesn't exist, so it's time to face cold reality and settle for Mr. Good Enough. This is Lori Gottlieb's advice in Saturday's Guardian to single women. ALL of whom, she assures us, are secretly desperate to get married and start popping out sprogs. She's so convinced of this that she has written a book about it.

Everyone wants an alpha male. Alpha males have good genes. It's biology. Not enough alpha males to go around? Never mind. If it's just sperm and child support poor lonely singletons are looking for, why wouldn't Mr. Mediocre-but-stable-making-good money be Mr. Just-as-good-as-anyone-else?

And since we're being brutally honest, why the hell would Mr. Perfect be slumming for Gottlieb's pathetic and shallow version of the single woman in the first place? One really has to wonder who actually is settling for whom?

Being reduced to our biological imperatives leaves little room for imagination, for creativity, for passion, or even just for fun. We simply settle, then we get on with it. It's possible that being lonely is worse than being bored, but it's very unlikely that settling for one will cure the other.

Tunnel Vision

2010-02-01T05:29:00.000-08:00

‘Did you take out the recyclables?’ my husband asks.

‘They’re in the refrigerator,’ I reply.

‘Are you hungry?’

I mumble something incoherent from behind the monitor.

I pour plain hot water from the mocha maker because I forgot to put in the coffee. Never mind. I slap a teabag in the cup of hot water and go back to the computer.

Spiders have taken residence in a number of nooks and crannies. They know the odds that dusting will happen in the near future are slim, and the safety of their homes is pretty much guaranteed.

My list of unanswered emails is growing longer every day and I haven’t done a blog post in two and a half weeks. So what’s the problem?

Tunnel Vision. Yep, it’s that time again. Everyone who knows me knows it happens periodically. I go underground. It’s like I’ve temporarily left the planet, and for all practical purposes, I have. I’ve got tunnel vision, and whenever that happens, I’m sucked mercilessly into another dimension, the dimension of the story. The thing about the dimension of the story is that it’s a whole lot easier for me to go there than it is for me to come back. Fortunately for the recyclables, though not for the spiders, short stories involve fairly brief stints in the land of Tunnel Vision. Five thousand words and I’m back home in time for a reality check.

But, I’m in the world of the novel now, and whenever I go there, it’s hard to say when I’ll get back home again. Add to that the fact that the novel is full of love, sex, intrigue, and people I’d like to be, and I’m very likely to linger as long as possible. In fact, I bet if you could go someplace similar right now, you would, wouldn’t you?

Come on, be honest! Everyone who’s ever read a good book gets the chance to follow the writer into that great world of Tunnel Vision. We all go there willingly and happily while the spiders take up residence and the recycling accumulates. We’re disappointed when it’s not quite the world we’d hoped for. We’re equally disappointed when it’s more than we could have imagined. When that happens, we don’t want to leave. We want to stay with those characters we’ve grown so fond of and take up residence in that place that now feels like home. We’ve grown used to the excitement, the adventure, the sex, the love, the intrigue, and we’ve especially grown used to the opportunity to, for a little while, be someone else.

The land of Tunnel Vision is also the land of multiple personalities. In my novel, I get to be ALL of the characters. They all whisper in my ear and tell me their sordid secrets and their darkest fantasies. Then I, like an evil gossip columnist, splash their inner workings all over the written page for the world to see. Bwa ha ha ha ha! I get to do that because I’m the most powerful person in their world. In fact, in their world, I’m god. K D giveth and K D taketh away!

So, I’ve come back from the world of Tunnel Vision just long enough to grab a sandwich, write a blog post and ignore the spiders. Consider this a postcard from the world of The Mount and Rita Holly’s initiation. It’s my way of saying ‘having a great time, wish you were here.’ I promise a detailed account this fall in the form of my novel, The Initiation of Ms Holly. But in the meantime, you’ll just have to settle for a blog post.

The Big Freeze, Déjà vu All over again -- only sexy!

2010-01-14T02:31:00.000-08:00

The arctic blasts of the past few weeks, complete with cancellations, supermarket hoardings, and transportation delays, bring back memories of last year’s big freeze. So does news of the electrical malfunctions on the Eurostar caused by the cold. I was coming home from Paris on the Eurostar last year when the cold blast hit. And the train stopped.

As the carriage got darker and darker, as the canteen closed down and the apologies and updates from the conductor became fewer and farther between, we all secretly wondered if there was something we weren’t being told, possibly something a little more sinister going on… After a few hours in the dark, under the English Channel without food or liquid refreshment, people do get a bit tetchy.

Through it all, I couldn’t keep from eavesdropping on the two passengers sitting behind us. One of them was a young woman. The second was an elderly gentleman who was retired Royal Air Force. The woman was claustrophobic. The fear in her voice was palpable, though she did her best to keep panic at bay and maintain dignity.

I listened, off and on, for four and a half hours while the gentleman kept her in light conversation, asking all the right questions while regaling her with stories from his days in the military. Every time the panic reemerged in her voice, there was another interesting story, or another question about her job, or how she liked living in London, or what her hobbies were.

At last the train was mercifully towed out of the tunnel and into Ashford. Those of us who knew we weren’t going to get home even if we did make it on to London were given accommodations for what was left of the night at Eurostar’s expense. As my husband and I sat in our comfy room enjoying beer and chicken salad sandwiches, I wondered what other ways one might keep one’s mind off being in a pitch black train stalled under a bazillion gallons of water.

Of course the answer was obvious. Wouldn’t hot, hammering sex keep ones mind off these less than stellar circumstances? If so, what would that sex be like, with an unseen partner offering comfort in a sightless world completely dependent on the other senses. And Viola! The Initiation of Ms Holly was born. It was natural for a mythology buff like me to link the sightless grope-fest unfolding in my mind with the story of Psyche and Eros. How would our modern day Psyche pursue her hidden Eros, and what obstacles might she face if she lived in London and had to undergo initiation to gain access to a twenty-first century Mount Olympus in order to be with her Eros, in order to even see his face?

Big cotton knickers, white chocolate willies, trains stranded under the English Channel… Inspiration is often an ambush -- full on, head-over-heals, rough and tumble leading to places a very long and convoluted way from where it all began.

The Initiation of Ms Holly will be published this fall by Xcite Books, at which time all that is hidden shall be revealed...

BWE 2010 is Sexy!

2010-01-06T08:06:00.000-08:00

Sex SF has included Best Women's Erotica 2010 on its ten sexy books of 2009 list.

Granny Knickers and White Chocolate Willies

2010-01-03T10:32:00.000-08:00

With guest arriving for lunch in less than two hours, me still in sweats and the house still in need of a good hoovering, I’m hard at work researching a story. I’m browsing the cotton granny knickers in the Sainsbury clothing department. As I try to decide whether white knickers will be best or if tiny pink flowers might be a nice touch, my brain is contemplating the sexiness of large cotton underpants. I decide on plain white and hurry to meet my husband near the checkout, where he glances impatiently at his watch.

The hoovering gets done, and I manage a shower and slap on some make-up. It’s a lovely lunch with good conversation and good friends. It’s great catching up and reminiscing. But as we talk about recipes and walking in Snowdonia, in the back of my mind I consider how loose granny panties would have to fit before one could tie the crotch in a knot.

I serve up pudding wondering how cotton knickers taste dripped in caramel sauce, or how one would feel if one received a pair under the Christmas tree, all wrapped up in gold paper, with a sexy note from a lover. Over coffee, I think about what a spanking might feel like through white cotton knickers, and as we say good-bye at the door, the story begins to form in my head.

Now the house is quiet, and I sit at the computer with a cup of tea, sucking on white chocolate willies – a gift from a friend, who somehow just intuited I would be the type to enjoy rude chocolate. I know I’m surrounded by lots of things that aren’t sexy, but as I think about granny knickers and the spark of a story I wonder just how many things, everyday things that I have yet to contemplate are sexy, or at least could be with a little imagination and enough rude chocolate.

It Gets Better!

2009-12-30T11:52:00.000-08:00

One of my pet peeves is the pop-culture assumption that no one over thirty has sex, and if they do, they're probably not very good at it. Guess again! Let's here it for experience. Check out this fabulous article in today's Times

The Female Gaze

2009-12-30T11:12:00.000-08:00

If you'd like to learn more about what turns women on visually, then you won't want to miss this exciting presentation by editor of Filament Magazine, Suraya Sidhu Singh

'The female gaze' - Photographing men erotically for women

This will be a presentation rich in photographic examples - ranging from the stunning, to the hilarious, to the baffling - as well as unravelling research findings, all of which tell us a story about the beauty of the erotic mind and the constricted, stereotyped world in which women's erotica has often been produced.

Where?

Sh! Women's Store

Spaces are limited, but totally free, so email Renee at renee@sh-womenstore.com to book a place.

When?

Wednesday 20 January at 7 pm.

About Suraya Sidhu Singh

New Zealand born and London-based, 31-year-old Suraya Sidhu Singh is the editor and founder of Filament magazine (http://www.filamentmagazine.com <http://www.filamentmagazine.com/> ), the first women's magazine that seeks to present a genuine female gaze in its photography of men. She has studied research-informed public policy and worked as an advisor in various government agencies for nine years, before becoming an editor and pornographer.

Good Review!

2009-12-27T08:02:00.000-08:00

Best Women's Erotica 2010 appeals to men too, according to this great review in Calgary Life and Style

2009-12-20T07:08:00.000-08:00

from left, Jacqueline Applebee, yours truly, our fab editor Violet Blue, and Scarlet French

The book with all the best bits

Sh!
Reading the good bits!

Remember when you were an adolescent, always skipping to the naughty parts of a book, a book you probably weren’t supposed to be reading in the first place. Actually, it was always easy to find the naughty parts because the books, any book any adolescent ever had hold of, would always just fall open to those bits from frequent perusing, if you get my meaning.

Imagine a whole book of nothing but naughty parts! Wow! Does it get any better? That was pretty much the theme of Friday night at Sh! Women's Shop, where our amazing editor, Violet Blue, my sisters in erotica, Jacqueline Applebee and Scarlet French got to read nothing but the best bits from Cleis Books Best Women’s Erotica 2010 and Jaquie gave us a delicious taste of The Best of The Best Women's Erotica, to be released in February.

Along with our enthusiastic audience we gathered in Sh! to drink pink fizz, eat cupcakes and be titillated by story. It was bliss!

For more photos, check out my Facebook

Renee and Joanna and the lovely women at Sh! were hostesses extraordinaire, and I had to be practically shoved out the door at the end of the evening because it was such a great place to be. Sh! is definitely the place to find that perfect naughty gift for someone nice (and might I recommend a copy of BWE2010). I was occupied reading and drinking fizz Friday night, but I’ll be back with shopping list in hand.

Don’t be too disappointed if you missed it. Plans are already in the works for another reading of the best bits in March, with Best of the Best Women's Erotica topping the menu.

Sexy Friday Night

2009-12-13T15:58:00.000-08:00

Wow! Check this out from Scarlett French. Am I going to be in amazing company or what?!

"Are you already sick of 'Jingle Bells'? Fancy a bit of subversion to make you feel normal?

Then come to Sh! Women's Erotic Emporium (Hoxton Square, London N1) for a bit of pre-Christmas aural porn - this Friday, 18th December, 7pm.

Scarlett French and K D Grace will be reading from the recently launched Best Women's Erotica 2010

Jacqueline Applebee will give us a little taster of Best of Best Women's Erotica, due out early next year.

In addition to these consummate pleasures, I have great delight in announcing that we will have with us the sublime Violet Blue, author of many bestsellers including The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus, The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio, The Ultimate Guide to Adult Videos, and How to Kiss. She is also the editor of the Best Women's Erotica series and many other erotic anthologies. She is a high profile blogger and tech personality and can found at www.tinynibbles.com (and at Sh! this Friday!)"

The venue is limited to thirty people, so if you want to come, please call Joanna at
0207 613 54 58.

Neighbourhood: Haggerston
57 Hoxton Square
London N1 6PB

www.sh-womenstore.com

Erotica, the Ultimate Safe Sex

2009-12-13T15:36:00.000-08:00

I once sat through a reading of four fairly well-known romance writers, who had great stage presence, read beautifully from their new best sellers, and answered the audience’s questions with the level of expertise one would expect from people who make their living as writers. That is until they were asked about writing sex.

There was a frisson of embarrassment across the stage and a lot of shifting and shuffling and throat clearing as all four made excuses for why they were uncomfortable writing sex and therefore didn’t do it if they could avoid it. Then the question was dismissed with all the gravity a question about the proper shade of lippy might have been.

I wanted to shout, ‘This is sex! It’s the biggie! It’s what romance leads to! It’s what made us all! Beyond the shouting, sex is the powerful leveler of persons that strips us of our facades and brings us down to the deepest part of ourselves, and occasionally the best part. It exposes our animal nature with all its crudeness and all its charm. Sex is one of the best ways for a reader to get to know a character. With that in mind, I can’t imagine why all writers aren’t dying to write their next sex scene.

I appreciate a good sex scene in a novel – any novel – because sex in fiction, no matter how dangerous, is always safe sex. I enjoy writing erotica because it allows me, and my reader, to experience sex vicariously, safely, in ways we would never experience it in the real world. In some cases it’s only to see what the appeal of being there is. In other cases it’s the fulfillment of fantasy on the written page done safely without leaving the comfort of the recliner. For me, as writer and reader, there’s also the added excitement of sharing fantasies with total strangers.

I’m told I don’t look like the type of woman who would write erotica, but the more I write, the more I wonder why the type of woman who writes erotica shouldn’t be Everywoman. We all have fantasies, and I can speak first hand as to how hot it is to write those fantasies down – in detail. No one needs to read them but ourselves. Hey, it’s a cheap sex toy – a piece of paper and a pen – a hot pink one, maybe??? It’s safe sex at its best. The world of the written page has always allowed us to walk in other dimensions, other realities, other times, and to see the world through the eyes of other people. Why shouldn’t sex be included in those other realities?

Coming home from the States on a night flight a couple of weeks ago, unable to sleep, I found myself watching the film, The Ugly Truth, with Gerard Butler and Katherine Heigle. Butler’s character is trying to help Heigle’s character develop a relationship with a hot doctor. He asks her how often she masturbates. Horrified, she says she doesn’t do that sort of thing, to which he replies, ‘If you don’t want to make love to yourself, what makes you think anyone else will want to?’

According to Wallace Shawn, “Sex really is a nation of its own. Those whose allegiance is given to sex at a certain moment withdraw their loyalty temporarily from other powers. It's a symbol of the possibility that we might all defect for one reason or another from the obedient columns in which we march.”

I’ll admit it; I’m a defector to that nation of sex. It’s a large nation with lots of room, and I’m inviting everyone I know to defect and enjoy.

You can read Wallace Shawn’s great essay about writing sex here:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/stage/2009/jun/20/wallace-shawn-writing-about-sex

The Initiation of Ms Holly

2009-12-12T13:34:00.000-08:00

It's finally happened! Xcite Books is publishing my hot novel, The Initiation of Ms Holly, in October 2010! I know it's a long wait, but it'll be worth the wait. In the meantime, you can look forward to sex on a train, sex on a Harley, sex in leather and stilletos with a bit of mythology thrown in for good measure. And love. Let's not forget the best part! http://www.booktrade.info/index.php/showarticle/24187

2009-02-28T11:48:00.000-08:00

Hi and welcome to my blog. I'm a writer of fiction, and I'd like to show you where to find some of my recently published stories.

First, one of my stories, "Archeogasms", is now published in this UK paperback: Liasons, a Black Lace anthology

Next, I have a story entitled "Small Town Tastes" in this recent ebook, published in the US by Ravenous Romance: Power Plays. This book will be soon be available in paperback.

I also have a story, "Wet Dreams", in this Ravenous Romance anthology: Experimental: An Anthology on Sex and Science. This book also will soon be available in paperback.

My short story, "Cultivation", is also published here: Cultivation

You can link to all my Ravenous stories at my Ravenous Romance author's page: K. D. Grace

I also have two other stories coming in Black Lace erotic anthologies:

"On Keeping Pets", to be published in Sexy Little Numbers
"Vetting the Affair", to be published in The Affair

Also, check out my story "Hard Times" in this anthology: Naughty Spanking: v. 3

And look for my story "Vegging" in Best Women's Erotica 2010.

Watch this space, because more publications are coming soon.